During my most recent holidays, travelling from Sofia to Budapest, I came across a mix of the things that I try to figure out when I am working: experiences with and conversations about brands. In a way, it felt like watching a movie for which you have written the script. As if everything I had told during presentations and written in reports was coming to life.

• Act, don’t tell. Promise whatever you want, but what you do makes the difference.
• Be a brand about it. If you are a brand, take your responsibility anytime, anywhere.
• Get the basics right. It is easier to do things right, than to screw them up.

In retrospect, these were three simple truths about running a business that were illustrated during a trip from Sofia to Budapest, with a stop in Vienna. In a series of four blog posts, I tell the story of these adventures, from the little conversations we had about brands over the big experiences we had with companies to the little stuff that happened in between.

In the first post, our office manager Myriam beat no less than three car rental companies in actually getting us a car. In this second post, you are about to find out how finding a car was just one thing – actually getting the car was a completely different story.

Act, don’t tell. Part II.
It’s often the little things about our experiences that we share with others. After spending a great night at the wonderful Hotel & Villa Auersperg in Salzburg, all I could talk about was the floor heating in the bathroom (I did not even use the floor heating) and the connection to link my iPhone to the soundsystem (I did use the connection, but only to charge my phone). After indulging in an incredible breakfast at the same hotel, I added the buffet to my top 3 of arguments for recommending this place in the future. However, I still like to think that the floor heating is actually a more intriguing and convincing conversation starter than yet another hotel with a great breakfast.

During the taxi ride to the Hertz office where we were supposed to pick up the car, we speculated about the brand that we were going to be driving in the coming days. Our most recent car rental adventure involved a Fiat Panda which gained a cult-like status in my consideration set (next to Audi and BMW) during a sometimes offroad trip on the island of Lanzarote. Obviously, we were curious to see which car manufacturer was to get its chance at impressing us this time. As the day before, at Linz airport, everything seemed to be going smoothly: the car was waiting, the paperwork filled out and we were offered a great deal. If we passed by Vienna to pick up a car that had to go back to Budapest anyway, we would receive a 200 euro discount on the one-way fee, which we had to pay for dropping the car off at a different location. Sounded like a no-brainer. So we went for it.

The begin of trouble
The trouble began when we tried to pay with our credit card. The machine made a noise that sounded like “denied” and the Hertz girl handling our rental gave us a stare. During the unsuccessful attempts that followed, where Hertz girl repeatedly tried the card and became increasingly annoyed, I suddenly noticed a sign on the wall. It said S.M.I.L.E. – an acronym that summed up the way Hertz employees were supposed to behave towards customers. In all fairness, I don’t remember what the acronym exactly stands for (I do know the S was for “Smile!”), so it might be that the E was for “Except when their credit card malfunctions”. That could explain why Hertz girl did not smile at all.

After several attempts with both my VISA and my girlfriend’s, it became clear that we would have to get in touch with our respective banks to figure out what was wrong. I went first and seemed to be in luck. The people over at the local Dexia office assured me that at 3PM the problem would be solved. It was around lunchtime by now, so we told Hertz girl that we would go for something to eat and come back later. In what I interpreted as an unguarded moment of kindness on her behalf, she allowed us to leave our luggage in the office and off we went for lunch.

Our smiling Hertz-intern
Unfortunately, the problem was not solved at all when we returned. Hertz girl made it very clear that her job description did not involve playing credit card bingo. On top of that, I could not reach the banker who was going to fix my problem and my girlfriend was even worse off in trying to reach her bank, Intesa Sanpaolo: 23 phone calls were not answered at all, 4 were answered but immediately interrupted and 2 got through, got transferred and then ended with a flat, disappointing tone. Two hours later, at 5PM when Hertz girl had been replaced by Hertz guy, I finally received a call back. The fax that had to be sent to fix the problem, had never been sent. Someone forgot, this time they would do it for real. Fifteen minutes later, we had high-fived the Hertz intern (who was the only one actually smiling in the past hours) and got into our silver KIA Venga.

Loving an acronym
You might wonder if it is actually a good idea to hang up a poster telling how your staff should behave. It just seems more natural if your staff actually behaves that way. If you love an acronym so much that you do decide to stick it against the office wall, you better make sure that your staff behaves that way. You might also wonder what the problem with my credit card was exactly. I will get to that later, but if a company says 3PM, even five minutes later is a disappointment, let alone two hours and fifteen minutes later. The KIA Venga did not make it into my consideration set, but at least that decision was supported by how the car actually acted during the “test ride” I paid for – not by a discrepancy with what the brand told me.